Serving Food: Just Don't Disappoint Yourself

A person who wants too many things can never be fully satisfied. But so far, Jiang Xu hadn't wanted for anything.

The snacks Liang Xiaoqing had given her worked their magic—this time, Jiang Xu didn't have to endure her stomach growling before the last class ended, drawing odd glances from her classmates.

The final class of the morning was the ultimate test of a student's focus. Everyone was distracted, coiled and ready to spring. Even the most diligent student in the class couldn't help but let their mind wander.

Finally, the bell rang with a series of clangs, and the teacher, being understanding, didn't hold them past time.

"Class dismissed."

Students rushed for the door in twos and threes, sprinting at full speed. The ones in front were usually the boys, and the girls, disapproving, complained: "So desperate, like they've never eaten before."

That was the girl in class who loved to pick fights. She packed up her textbook and linked arms with her roommate, heading for the cafeteria. As they passed by Jiang Xu, the other girl said, "Li Xue, hurry up! If we're any later, there won't be any food left!"

Li Xue said impatiently, "I know, I know," and was dragged out by her companion.

Soon, the entire classroom grew quiet. From the loudspeaker outside came a scratchy tune, punctuated by bursts of crackling static that made the room feel even more silent. Jiang Xu got up from her seat and tucked the textbook from the last class into her desk drawer.

A round-faced girl hadn't hurried off yet. She glanced at Jiang Xu and said, "Jiang Xu. Aren't you going to eat?"

This girl was named Jiang Erya. Like Jiang Xu, she wasn't much of a talker and had few friends in class.

"I'm about to go."

Jiang Xu replied politely and headed for the door, but Jiang Erya suddenly trotted over. "Jiang Xu."

Jiang Xu kept walking and said, "What is it?"

Jiang Erya followed closely, "...Jiang Xu..." As the words were about to come out, her face flushed crimson. "I... can I go eat with you?"

Pairing up to go to the bathroom, pairing up to go to the cafeteria, pairing up to go back to the dorm—students in their school days all tacitly kept to this unspoken rule. Of course, Jiang Xu knew what it felt like to walk alone with no companion, catching the occasional subtle glance from passersby.

"Mm." When Jiang Xu heard her ask to eat together, she slowed her steps. She thought of Liang Xiaoqing. She paused for a moment, then continued forward.

Jiang Erya jogged up and linked her arm through Jiang Xu's. Her face was bright red as she managed only a few words: "Thank you, Jiang Xu."

By the time Jiang Xu and Jiang Erya arrived at the cafeteria, the peak rush had passed. Jiang Xu wasn't used to having her arm linked; she walked a bit briskly, and Jiang Erya, being shorter, couldn't keep pace. She let go of Jiang Xu's arm and trailed behind.

"What do you want to eat?"

At the entrance, Jiang Xu deliberately turned around to ask Jiang Erya.

"Anything's fine." Jiang Erya was a little nervous.

"Then let's meet up over there later."

Jiang Xu pointed to the corner seat she usually took. Jiang Erya let out a delighted "Mm!" and the two of them parted ways.

Jiang Xu wasn't a picky eater. She could swallow down even the worst-tasting food—it was like the innate hunting instinct of an animal. A serving of shredded potatoes, plus a dish of tofu stewed with greens—the same meal Jiang Xu had eaten for two months, and she planned to keep eating it.

After getting her food and reaching her seat, Jiang Erya still hadn't arrived. Jiang Xu glanced over at the teachers' dining area—a sparse handful of people there. She withdrew her gaze, sat down, and was just about to eat.

"Xiao Xu."

"There you are—I've been looking for you everywhere." Liang Xiaoqing happened to be passing by. When she saw Jiang Xu, her eyes lit up, and she sat down across from her. "Didn't we agree to have lunch together today?"

Liang Xiaoqing leaned slightly forward, looking at her.

"Sister Qing." Jiang Xu, interrupted, picked up her chopsticks and brought a few grains of rice to her mouth, her eyes fixed on the bland dishes in front of her. "There were too many people at noon; I didn't see you." As she spoke, she quickly glanced up at Liang Xiaoqing, then picked up a few shreds of potato and put them in her mouth.

"Oh... it was my oversight." Liang Xiaoqing leaned toward her again and looked at her tray. "But Xiao Xu, is this all you're eating for lunch?"

The familiarity between them now allowed her to cross that line.

"Mm." Jiang Xu bit her chopsticks in acknowledgment, trying to act calm as she continued eating, but in truth, she was picking at the food on her plate.

Liang Xiaoqing probably didn't know that Jiang Xu remembered her—remembered every word she said, every expression she made, every movement she made. Even in a sea of people, she could find her by a single glimpse of her back.

Jiang Xu sometimes found it strange. Before she met Liang Xiaoqing, they were strangers with no connection at all. How was it that now she remembered her so vividly?

Strange turned into curiosity, pooling in her heart like a shallow puddle, occasionally stirred by ripples.

"Sss..." Liang Xiaoqing straightened up, looked at Jiang Xu eating like a little rabbit, then at the food she'd gotten, and her delicate brows knitted into a crease. "No. At your age, you're still growing. Eating this little just won't do." She reached over and took Jiang Xu's wrist.

After two months of care, Jiang Xu's skin had become much fairer than before. Her hair, now properly tended, was no longer frizzy; it was tied in a low ponytail, with a few loose strands at her forehead clipped aside by a star-shaped barrette, revealing a smooth forehead and big, bright eyes.

The star-shaped barrette was something Liang Xiaoqing had bought. Liang Xiaoqing met those fox-like eyes and pursed her lips. "...I'll go along with you on everything else. But this one, no." She seemed to think of something, then let out a sigh. "Ah, it's my fault for not thinking it through."

Jiang Xu met those apologetic eyes. She was pulled up from her seat by Liang Xiaoqing, who bent down as if leaning against her but actually brushed past her body to pick up her tray from the table.

Just then, Jiang Erya came over with her food. "Jiang Xu, I'm here." Her round face broke into a simple, warm smile, which turned into a stutter when she saw Liang Xiaoqing. "Liang, Liang Teacher."

Hearing Jiang Erya address Liang Xiaoqing, Jiang Xu felt an inexplicable flash of wariness. She turned to look at Liang Xiaoqing's smiling face, then belatedly realized she might be overreacting. She suppressed the feeling and stood off to the side, head slightly lowered.

"You're Xiao Xu's classmate, right?" Liang Xiaoqing said.

Jiang Erya stopped stuttering, but her voice grew softer: "...Yes."

As she spoke, her gaze shifted from Liang Xiaoqing to Jiang Xu, then back again.

"Mm..." Liang Xiaoqing looked at Jiang Xu, quite gratified. "It seems our Xiao Xu has made a friend after all."

Jiang Xu's brows furrowed slightly. She wanted to say no, but Liang Xiaoqing didn't give her a chance to speak.

"What's your name?"

"Jiang Erya." Seeing how approachable Liang Xiaoqing was, the nervousness Jiang Erya felt around a teacher gradually melted away.

Liang Xiaoqing glanced at her tray—two big scoops of rice, plus two large steamed buns and two big stuffed buns. It looked even plainer than Jiang Xu's meal.

"Erya, you and Xiao Xu both come over."

"Oh, oh." Erya was a bit plump, and she nodded obediently and dazedly, following behind Liang Xiaoqing.

Maybe Liang Xiaoqing treated every student the same—gentle, kind, considerate. Jiang Xu walked behind her, side by side with Jiang Erya. The soft hand released her wrist, the touch fading, but in the cold weather, she could still feel the lingering warmth on her skin.

Liang Xiaoqing led them to the teachers' dining area.

"Sit."

Liang Xiaoqing found a spot that wasn't too conspicuous. Jiang Erya nodded and sat down, and Jiang Xu sat down beside her.

After settling them in, Liang Xiaoqing picked up their trays and headed for the serving window.

Another view of her back.

Jiang Erya tilted her head to see Jiang Xu watching Liang Xiaoqing, still feeling a sense of unreality. She poked Jiang Xu's arm, still timid.

"Jiang Xu, are you close with Teacher Liang?"

Jiang Xu turned her head, staring straight ahead. She shook her head, and as if that wasn't enough to answer Jiang Erya's question, she added, "Not close." It was only a relationship of sympathy—how could that count as familiarity? If she hadn't run into Liang Xiaoqing, she might not even have met Jiang Erya.

"Oh." Jiang Erya couldn't find anything else to say. Looking at Jiang Xu's cool expression, she could only fall silent.

After a wait, Liang Xiaoqing returned with the trays. She set them on the table. On each tray were two meat dishes: shredded pork with green peppers and scrambled eggs with tomatoes.

The trays were piled high. The stir-fried dishes were generously oiled, and the mingled aromas of food and meat wafted toward Jiang Xu's nose.

Liang Xiaoqing looked at her, then at Jiang Erya.

"Eat up. The food's not too hot anymore—it won't taste as good once it gets cold."

Jiang Erya swallowed, nodded eagerly, and, unable to resist the lure of the savory smell, started moving her chopsticks, shoveling big mouthfuls into her mouth.

"Slow down, Erya. The dishes go well with the buns." Liang Xiaoqing was a bit amused. Noticing Jiang Xu hadn't picked up her chopsticks yet, she said, "Eat, Xiao Xu."

Jiang Xu flickered her eyes and obediently picked up her chopsticks, taking small bites of the dishes Liang Xiaoqing had gotten for her.

It was indeed tastier than tofu stewed with greens.

"..." Liang Xiaoqing didn't rush off. She sat across from them, watching Jiang Xu eat with slow, deliberate bites. She propped her chin on one hand and tapped the table with the fingers of the other.

"Xiao Xu."

Hearing her voice, Jiang Xu put down her chopsticks and looked up at her.

The furrow in her brow from thinking slowly relaxed.

Liang Xiaoqing said, "From now on, for lunch and dinner, will you eat with me?"

Jiang Xu froze. She avoided Liang Xiaoqing's eyes and shook her head, then lowered her head to keep eating.

The rhythmic tapping on the table grew louder in Jiang Xu's ears. Just because of a casual remark from Liang Xiaoqing, her whole body tensed up. She heard Liang Xiaoqing continue, "It's just like at home—isn't it the same at home..."

Rejected, Liang Xiaoqing muttered to herself, but because Jiang Xu was too withdrawn to say anything, the words trailed off halfway.

She looked thoughtfully at Jiang Xu's face, paused, set down the hand propping her chin, straightened her back, and built up a bit of authority. "Also, Teacher Jin told me you've been spacing out during class. What are you thinking about?"

Timid Erya was startled, and Jiang Xu froze too, but her mouth was quicker than her mind.

"Nothing," she said.

It was a way of going along with others—agreeing with them verbally, not arguing just because her own views differed. When Jiang Daguo had questioned her in a rage, or explained his so-called reasoning in a calmer mood, the thing Jiang Xu did most was nod and comply. But clearly, this method of dealing with people couldn't be used on Liang Xiaoqing.

Liang Xiaoqing wasn't the type to only allow others to listen to her, so even her questioning felt careful.

"...It's the lessons being too fast; I couldn't keep up..." For the first time, Jiang Xu tried to defend herself, telling a lie that would require another lie to cover up.

Jiang Xu wanted to be a good, obedient child in Liang Xiaoqing's eyes, but perhaps lying to someone she didn't want to lie to made her heart race.

"I just..."

She couldn't articulate it.

Liang Xiaoqing looked at her, eyes bright as two clear springs, as if seeing right through her. Softly, she said, "...Xiao Xu, I'm not trying to scold you."

As she spoke, she stood up and gently touched Jiang Xu's head, letting out a sigh. "Just don't disappoint yourself."